March Madness: Horror Characters Who Went Insane

Welcome to Hornet, the the podcast.

Did that freak you out? It did. I was like, do we have a robot in Riverside counting down and sounding like some super sexy space age mother? It sounded like mother from Alien.

Ooh, that might be one of the nicest compliments I've ever gotten about my voice.

Thank you.

Thank you. Mother, that's that's you know, I think that's all we want is for for gays to call us mother. Well, yes! Yes, queen, yes, mama. Mama, oh that sounds very I don't know, French or something. I don't know. I know.

Elegant.

We are. We're uh like we said last time, we're some classy bitches, we're some classy girls.

Well, you know what's not elegant? You might see a slight look of pain on my face because I just tweaked my neck trying to flat iron my hair. Ladies and gentlemen, uh that is 42. Just so you know, if you want body hard, just get old. Just make it to your parties.

You know what's really weird is that happened to me a couple days ago in the booth. I was doing a job and I recorded, and I think I just tensed up, and now my neck just keeps seizing. So this is what happens.

This is what happens.

This is this is your future, kids. I mean, you know, hopefully the future is they could still be as good looking as we are, but I know her. I know, right?

I feel like yelling at Sue. Hi, I'm Jimmy Moore. Fuck you, Sue. I'm feeling very the substance right now. That's a vibe. Truly. Total vibe. Total vibe. Elizabeth Sparkle wants Sue to know that well. Anyhow.

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Our father went insane and killed us.

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Well, I guess that's gonna be the sketch going in this episode. Amazing. Okay, I think I found it. Perfect. Poify. I think I found it. We already recorded it, so that's great. Okay. Ah, oh well, um, I guess it's time to out of my handy-dandy mug do the thing that you do at the live shows and pull what we're gonna talk about today. Wait a minute. Is that a Starbucks Pike place? It is from the mothership.

Because I just found a Portland Starbucks cup at a Goodwill, and I'm like, I love Portland. And I went ahead and swooped it up. And then my boyfriend Isaac, you know, the killer from Scream, he has uh the Yosemite one. There is like a huge connection. If we're gonna talk about psychos, right, we all go a little mad sometimes. I mean, one of the one of my favorite moments in horror films is Billy Loomis quoting Norman Bates. I mean, that's kind of a cool tie-in.

We all go a little mad too bad.

Um is literally how I'm opening the uh the video for the March Madness edition of Horror Nerd at the Improv. Apparently, March Madness has something to do with balls. Basket, balls. I don't care. It was alliteration. It sounded cool to me. My four-way, my boyfriend blessed his heart. Uh so Isaac literally was like on YouTube looking for some sort of basketball horror tie-in, and he did find a movie where I forget what it's called. He did find a movie where a woman who I think it's uh the mom from the Goonies, Mama Fratality. I think it's her, I think it's the same actress, um, she gets like beheaded with a basketball. So I'm like, I might have to put that in the video just because of the basketball.

That's incredible. We need to watch this movie. Yeah.

Yeah.

I thought you were gonna say a a horror movie with basketballs, and I was gonna say the luck of the Irish from the Disney Channel. Do you remember that? Yeah, yeah. That was basketball in that, right? Yeah, yeah. And he was a leprechaun.

I can't remember losing anything ever.

It's just bad luck.

And just when he thought it couldn't get any worse. It did.

Oh no! I'm turning into a Vulcan. And oh, this episode is coming out on March 17th. Isn't that weird? Right? I know. So when I lived on the East Coast, temporarily it was a big, like college basketball city. And when I moved out there, everybody was like, What's your favorite team for March Madness? I said, I don't know. I I I'm not from here. And they were saying, you have to pick this set this one or this one. I'm like, I have no skin in the game, I don't care. But your March Madness, the show coming up on the 20th, I'm so stoked for that. That's my kind of March Madness, is our favorite movie psychopaths from horror movies. My favorites. Yeah. Let your podcast rise from undead obscurity. Beamly hosts your show, builds your site, handles paywalls and memberships with zero platform fees. Your resurrection begins at beamly.com.

Has descended into madness for various reasons in horror. Mm-hmm. There's a lot. I mean, there's, you know, like there's it's we're not quite doing good for her, meaning someone was driven to rage, someone was driven to be like, you know what? Fuck all y'all. Like Carrie. Well, I mean, I would say Margaret White, definitely. Carrie's mom, like uh the idea, the concept, the fear of sin drove her insane. For sure.

Mm-hmm. Yeah, I think if she was, you know, she would have been one of the mutants in the X-Men. She would have been drafted to that school, away from all those assholes at her high school, and they would have been like, here, levitate this thing, Carrie White. Like Professor X would have been like, you can do this, Carrie. Like it would have been a whole thing. She would have been loved there. But no, she went to that asshole high school, and that they did that to her. I maintain that. They did that to her. She didn't have the madness like her mom. And you know, if she had access to therapy, I don't think she would have been as like I don't know, maybe she wouldn't have snapped. Yeah, that's a good question.

What care do you snap if she had health care? Um, I don't know. Possibly. I mean, you know, the greatest thing about therapy is they give you tools, you know, um, to work with bullying. I mean, granted, looking back, I as a kid who was very overweight and very came from some some traumatic shit happening. Like I was, I was not a popular kid by any means. I was bullied pretty relentlessly. Would I have locked everyone in the gym? Maybe. I don't know. I think I just think she got it from every angle. There was no safe space for Carrie. She couldn't relax at home. She couldn't uh talk to her friends, she couldn't um, you know, she didn't even have a dog, right? She didn't even have a little dog or something. Um, so there's kind of like, I don't think she was an unwell girl. I think she was just pushed and pushed and pushed and pushed and pushed to a breaking point. But then one of my definite favorite, um, uh, Pearl, uh love Pearl, who doesn't love the X trilogy. Pearl is is a great example of someone who maybe was, mm-mm, you know, I don't know what I would diagnose her with. I'm not a therapist, but did she have some, some uh like emotional challenges? Yeah, definitely. Um, you put that, and then you isolate her on a farm with the overcontrolling mom. Um, and then, you know, her big dance career. You know, there's a lot of people, bless their hearts, who think that they're the greatest singer or dancer and it's their whole dream and it's their whole world, and they get told no. But with her, she's isolated on a farm and then she gets married, the husband goes off to war. She's alone with her own thoughts. I mean, listen, I've had PMS and been alone with my own thoughts, but like if her constant state is just emotional chaos, this gonna drive you a little nuts and you might fuck a scarecrow.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, if please, if anyone doesn't know what that means, watch Pearl. Uh yeah. Why a scarecrow, Samantha? Just watch it.

Well, speaking of, I guess, mama drama, you could never, and again, I'm gonna go back to this, you could never make me hate Anthony Perkins and Psycho. You could never. Norman, he was hot, you know. I get it. I would flirt with him too, but I could fight, so I think I could take him. But I'm watching and I'm like, he's he's really good looking. I definitely get it.

It it might be uh nicer and warmer in the office.

I think that's kind of uh you know, sometimes I mean you look at American Psycho, right? He's a good looking guy.

And it's so interesting this discussion of how we can understand where these characters are coming from and because we see it happen in the movie, right? Where we go, yeah, here's why they did that. But then are there other characters that we love as horror movie fans that maybe we have a harder time justifying why they do what they do, but we still love them anyways? You go, like, ooh, that guy is ooh, ooh, ooh. Yeah, what do you think?

Love Freddie Krueger, right? We know what his history is. This is not this was not a good person. So why are we laughing at his jokes? You know, so that that is definitely the interesting one. I mean, you can look at Jason and be like, well, you know, some stuff happened to him, you know, his mom got beheaded. He he, you know, everyone ignored him, and maybe he had some challenges as well. Uh, I don't feel that bad. Well, Jason, Jason's maybe a little bit more likable. Um, and then there's Michael Myers, who is he just pure evil? Is he just pure evil? Like, where did this kid come from?

R.I.P. Sigmund Freud, you would have had just a schmorgasboard of characters to analyze if you had been around long enough to see a lot of these horror movies. R.I.P.

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Then what about American Psycho? Like Patrick Bateman, right? What what I uh what's his deal? Is he is he uh born evil modeled after a Ted Bundy type? A very successful, well-spoken, attractive, affluent man? Where did this guy was he born evil?

What happened to this dude? You know? Yeah, and how has that movie become this archetype for men to live up to? Have you noticed that? Like a lot of these these red pill men are like, yes, American Psycho, that's the movie. That's the movie. Like, are you watching the same movie we were watching? Don't get me wrong. I love Christian Bale, he was superb in it, but I don't think that movie should be Patrick Bateman should be a role model. Hired.

Probably not.

I think you know what I think it it comes down to power. It comes down to power. Men, there are there are some, and there there are people out there, men, women, however, whoever. Some people just struggle with self-esteem and with self-worth, and they need to feel powerful in order to feel anything, or in order to feel that they have a place in the world. Um, so I don't know if people might look at Patrick Bateman and be like, wow, that's like a an edgy badass prom king that has everything. He gets all the girls and he has money and he has all these things that I want that I think are gonna make me feel better inside. Money, power, sex.

Um incredible record collection.

Incredible record collection. CDs, yeah. Yeah, so you know, yeah, that's a thing. So, you know, maybe perhaps that's why there are men who idolize him. But and also I think there are men who have um some real problems with empathy and don't realize uh, hey, this guy was hurting women. This isn't a role model situation. This is we're not supposed to want to be like that guy. We're we're supposed to say, hey, that was a fucked up character. Definitely interesting, good movie, but it's a movie. It's not something we should look into. You know, it certainly is interesting to see it in a film, you know, where no one actually gets hurt. It's uh because that's what we as horror fans like we're interested in exploring the macabre, the sad, the scary, the terrifying, and know that okay, we can sort of process some of our fears and trauma by watching this movie, but then everybody gets to go home at the end.

So yeah, it's a safe way to explore those darker themes that you don't often see explored in other genres. It's that idea of life after death with ghosts, right? And the afterlife and those things and our really silly horror movie serial killers that we love, like Freddie, who we shouldn't love, but he's funny. He's funny and campy, and we love him, but we shouldn't. But if that was a real guy, you'd go, Ugh, you know, but the fact that it's a movie and it's a movie genre that understands what it is, and that's why we go back to see it. It's why even Ghostface being quippy and stuff on the phone, it's all these characters that I don't think, especially you and I, I don't think we would like them in real life because that's actually hurting people. But in horror, it is that way to explore those themes without people actually getting hurt. And it it explores those topics and things like trauma and it's it's storytelling, but not, you know, we don't want to watch that stuff in a rom com. It doesn't fit, you know? That'd be weird if somebody thought of American Psycho as a rom-com. That's weird.

If they like intentionally made a rom-com version of that, like as a dark horror comedy, that would actually be pretty brilliant. If yes, we have to be pretty funny. Um but yeah, anyone who thinks it's actually funny, like, uh yeah, that guy's gonna wind up as a character on Law and Order as S V U. You know what I mean? Um yeah. Yeah, yeah. I don't know though, but like well, okay. Norman Bates, in a weird way, it's like he loves his mom so much. Like he doesn't seem evil, he seems lost and so lost without his mother and so unequipped to live in the world and have human relationships. But then you look at like Patrick Bateman, you're like, dude, you have everything. But also, I personally uh do not do well with arrogance. I do not like arrogant people. It turns me completely the fuck off. Confident? Sure, absolutely arrogant, do not like it. You know what we should do? We should do an episode where we pick different genre films and how how do we remake these into a horror film or vice versa. Yeah, that'd be fun.

Oh my god, I would love this. Okay, future episode. There we go.

Yeah.

Okay, I feel like we would be remiss. And again, if we okay. Can we understand where this character is coming from? Can we justify it? If you're into horror, healing, and handmade treasures, you're gonna love the mountain crone. Yeah, she's got two certifications in herbal medicine, one in herbal body care, and she's learning egg limpia because emotional demons need spiritual eviction notices. Plus, her eBay shop has handmade healing products and collectibles for when you need to heal and buy the things your parents wouldn't. Gotta love having grown-up money. Find the mountain crone on eBay, linked in our show notes, and on Instagram at the MTN Crone. Healing together and having fun while we do it. Or I don't know, I want to hear your thoughts on this. So you could never make me hate this character. You could never make me hate her. Annie in misery. Kathy Bates the great. Kathy Bates. She's so good.

Annie, are you okay? Are you okay? Annie was not okay in that movie. Um You know, she's so freaking good in that film that no, you could never, you could never hate her. But also, it's like you also feel bad for her in a way, because it's just it's really hard and sad to watch someone whose entire life is wrapped up in someone else's work. Like her entire life was, well, I don't know, it seemed like it in this situation, perhaps because she has Paul in, you know, the bed. Like, so maybe, maybe she does other things on her daily life when Paul's not currently being nursed back to health in her bed. Um, but her like like misery, the character is so important to her. Like misery, that character is more important to her than herself, than Annie. And that's there's sadness in that, at least for me, because I I know people who are so obsessed with someone else's career or something, a show or a something. And it's like, okay, why do you need to get away from your own life that bad that your whole world revolves around a fictional series or another character? So there is, it's like, what happened girl, what happened to you? Like, who hurt you? You know, how did you get to this point? Why are you so obsessed? Why are you so fixated? Um But you know, it's like, it's I think she does such an amazing job of like, wait, do we like you or are we afraid of you? Do you mean well or are you gonna? So, you know, it's just that like that tension the entire time. And I have to say, one of my favorite experiences getting to see a Broadway show in New York was misery. And I had to do it. I had to go when I realized that Lori Metcalfe was playing Annie, um, which speaking of obviously uh Ed Gean, she was phenomenal as uh as Gean's mother in in that series. I mean, terrifying, terrifying. Oh my God. That monologue, I think, in the first episode, was intense. Um, she's one of the greatest actors you'll ever see, particularly in a live show. I mean, she's wonderful on all the sitcoms at Jackie on Roseanne, of course, and she's done so many things. But um, seeing her, and it was Bruce Willis, which is pretty incredible. I'm so lucky that I got to see Bruce Willis play Paul Sheldon. So the, and I was like, I think I was in like the second row, and it was in previews, right? So um we get up to the scene where you know that the sledgehammer is coming out, you know what's about to happen. It was kind of a really cool moment collectively for those of us in the audience because we all just kind of looked at each other like, what the fuck is gonna happen? How are they gonna do this? How's this gonna go? And um, I don't know who directed that play, but whoever did did a f made a phenomenal choice, or maybe it was Lori who made the choice. I don't know. But the choice of when she came out, like came in, uh, you know. Through the door into the bedroom where he was at the bed, and the bed was like at the foot of the stage. The foot of the stage. See what I did there. The foot. I'm sorry. Um, so he's at the the edge of the stage, if you will, and the the bed is facing, you know, like towards us, the audience. She comes into the room and drops the sledgehammer on the stage so we could hear it was real. It was heavy. That was an actual massive weapon tool, right? So we're thinking, what the actual fuck? How are they gonna do this? So she comes up and you know, toys with them, we're like, oh my God, it's coming, it's coming, it's coming, it's coming. We're all like on the edge of our seat. And then she hoists it up. We're like, no, no, no, no. And then she does it. And you just so his feet were like this, hanging kind of off the stage, and you just see a foot go all the way in. And that's when we were like, oh my god, it's a prosthetic foot, but it looked so real. So Bruce Willis's actual legs were, I'm assuming, in a trapdoor, like under the bed. But the way that they set it up physically, it looked so real. It was so good. Um, but yeah, I mean, do you feel bad for her? Sure. But do you also kind of realize this woman needs to be put out of her misery because she's hurting someone? Yeah. Like the woman's not well, she's a little bit gone.

Yeah. The dark side of fandom.

Yeah. The dark side of fandom. That's the thing. I mean, we have people stalking celebrities. We have people, I mean, I saw some documentary the other day about um um the guy who was stalking Sandra Bullock and how he made it into her home and she was hiding in a closet. I mean, how terrifying, right? And this guy thinks that he knows Sandra Bullock or that they had an affair, whatever in his mind is going on, how fucking terrifying must she have been. Like that's that's awful. That's really, really awful. So, yeah, so fandom can be quite scary because there's a lot of people who would rather fixate on someone else than have to deal with their own shit. Probably because they have so much shit and hurt and confusion and pain inside that you know, they snap. They snap off other people. So that yeah, that's that's kind of the scary part of it. It the the scary part was yes, the sledgehammer, but the scary part was like the psychology behind what got us into that situation.

Yeah. Um so the moral is have multiple things you're passionate about, not just one thing.

Get a hobby, make some friends. Mm-hmm. It's iscellation, really. I think a lot of these characters that do have a descent into madness. I mean, okay, so one of my top favorite films of all time, definitely The Shining. You look at him, so okay, we know that he's battled alcoholism. We know that there was an incident with Danny where he did, you know, go a little too far with his own son. There was a little bit of an abuse concern there, there was a little bit of uh an alcohol, well, a huge alcoholism problem, obviously. So we had all that information going into, okay, so take all of these inner demons that you've already been battling, battling, and then we're gonna put you in an isolated hotel in the snow where you have no contact. And also the pressure of I need to write a book. Whoa, of course, you know, and then you add obviously the spirits who were like, check out this guy. He's perfect. This is prime time material for us, you know? So put all of that together and perfect storm of madness. Perfect storm of madness.

Perfect storm of March Madness.

Yeah, yeah.

So tell us about your show coming up, because I know we gotta wrap it up here, but tell us uh the deets and where we can come see it and all that stuff for anybody listening.

Friday, March 20th. Uh, if you have a hangover for March 13th, just wait. Friday the 13th, right? Yeah, we just missed it. But um a week later, let's get a little crazy. So all of the comics are gonna be talking about their favorite horror characters that have descended into madness. Um, I never know what the who's gonna talk about who or who's gonna perform as who, you never know. Um, but uh I do know that I have a door. So you know how I always like to decorate the stage? Yeah. Well, a little while ago I had a neighbor who was throwing away a door. So what did my what did I do? My ass picked it up, painted red rum on it, and I have a very old typewriter, probably who knows, from the 60s, maybe, and uh my little fake axe, and I have a giant Here's Johnny poster, and that's gonna be a big part of the actual set at the Hollywood Improvs.

Here's Johnny.

Tickets are on sale. Grab them. Amazing. And if you need me to be a little sledgehammer to bash somebody's ankles in if they heckle the comedians, let me know. I got you.

Well, I think what I need you to do is record a little Annie Wilkes intro for the show. And if they don't laugh and buy their two drink minimum, they get the sledgehammer. I think that's the way to do it.

Okay, I'll see what I can do. All right, until next time, friends. Stay nerdy and stay out of isolation. Yeah. Go hug somebody and and be good. Don't be don't be mad. Don't go mad. Be glad. That's their slogan, right? Be a baddie, not a maddie. I think. I don't know.

That's good.

Thanks. I'll see you in the next one.

Yeah, you will.

Oh, okay. Well, we gotta go because I'm turned on. Okay.

So then I turned 13. And I got to see my first scary movie in a theater. It was Scream. I became a woman that day. I did. Sometimes the killer underneath the mask is hideous and disgusting, and sometimes it's Skeet Alrich. Now I don't know what kind of a name Skeet is. But I'm pretty sure when I saw how hot he is, that's what it did. Just the whole back row. And I I convinced my dad to take me to see it six times. Six times. He had no idea it was my own personal Debbie Does Dallas.

This is not a test. This is your emergency broadcast system, announcing the conclusion of the Horror Nerds Comedy Podcast, sanctioned by Horror Nerds Productions. All authorized screams, laughter, and unhinged opinions of Class Four have now been safely contained. During this broadcast, all tangents, puns, and unsolicited horror takes were permitted without consequence. Emergency podcast services will resume after this brief transmission. Blessed be our final girls and our horror nerds founders, a podcast reborn. May humor be with you all.